It's happened, despite global economic downturn, a disturbing level of knife and gun culture, Jade Goody's plight, Polar Bears' struggle with changing ecosystems, Homosexual Priests and rampant drink driving, Asda have continued to offer great prices and a comfortable shopping experience; highlighted by my acquisition of a 500millilitre vessel of Frijj milkshake for 46 pence. That's a price that would cheer up even Howard from the Halifax adverts (reports are in that he's now a raging alcoholic and lurks around branches of HSBC screaming "Who gives you extra? We do!" through an upturned traffic cone).
What's more, Frijj released a limited edition run; Vanillaaarrgggh (Vanilla). It tastes great, and the simplistic black and white design caught my attention, standing out amongst a crowd of dairy produce. This limited edition, in my opinion, far surpasses the Raspberry flavour of yester-year, and races on by, like a vanilla Lewis Hamilton (not a racial slur, by any means).
Now I'm not an expert on the economic crisis, and I've no investments, and as such have no fear of the liquidisation of the FTSE, and I was never invited to the NASDAQ party anyway. But, if Asda can offer Frijj for 46p, it looks increasingly like everything will be fine. And that's something we can all be happy about (except Jade Goody and David Cameron {the death of a son is at its core an inherently humourless subject, even less so with a disability in cumulation to the death...So I'll leave that there}).
And on top of all this great news, I'm getting 83% of my RDA of Calcium. I'm really over the moon.
Showing posts with label Jade Goody. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jade Goody. Show all posts
Thursday, 26 February 2009
Sunday, 8 February 2009
These are the men who made our dreams come true...
Rugby players.
It's 10.8 degrees celsius, 67% humidity (it was 84% when I woke up, and 6.7 degrees celsius) and I'm sat in bed preparing to watch Wales and Scotland meet in the 3rd game of the Six Nations. Yesterday's rugby was at best pretty boring, and at worst duller than a standard measurement convention.
The overwhelming feeling that I've got from the first 3 minutes that I've watched on iPlayer is that the BBC are trying very hard to be arty, epic and a filmic. A nature program narrated by David Attenborough was matched with a pumping and highly produced drumbeat and the line "DRAMA". Then we get to the Rugby, and there's a 300-style narrated piece about Wales' rugby performance. Let's be fair, they're rugby players, not ancient war heroes.
What's next, a new filmic style of News reporting? Perhaps Trevor McDonald will announce just one word - 'Tragedy', while Beethoven's Pathetique Sonata plays over black and white collages of Jade Goody. Maybe a Kaleidoscopic image of HSBC, NatWest and Barclay's with a superimposed collection of money arranged to spell 'Buggered' to the tune of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah. Fiona Bruce crying whilst pictures of obese children struggling to press the keys on their iPhones to order more Domino's pizzas play behind her?
Maybe not, but my favourite quotes so far in this broadcast:
"Pull him off 10 minutes into the game" (Need I point out any innuendo here?)
"The only thing he was missing was a red nose"
"I think it's going to be very tight" (More innuendo)
"Running for ball" (This one could also be sexual)
"It will be sticky for the first few minutes" (It's getting far too easy)
Over and out.
It's 10.8 degrees celsius, 67% humidity (it was 84% when I woke up, and 6.7 degrees celsius) and I'm sat in bed preparing to watch Wales and Scotland meet in the 3rd game of the Six Nations. Yesterday's rugby was at best pretty boring, and at worst duller than a standard measurement convention.
The overwhelming feeling that I've got from the first 3 minutes that I've watched on iPlayer is that the BBC are trying very hard to be arty, epic and a filmic. A nature program narrated by David Attenborough was matched with a pumping and highly produced drumbeat and the line "DRAMA". Then we get to the Rugby, and there's a 300-style narrated piece about Wales' rugby performance. Let's be fair, they're rugby players, not ancient war heroes.
What's next, a new filmic style of News reporting? Perhaps Trevor McDonald will announce just one word - 'Tragedy', while Beethoven's Pathetique Sonata plays over black and white collages of Jade Goody. Maybe a Kaleidoscopic image of HSBC, NatWest and Barclay's with a superimposed collection of money arranged to spell 'Buggered' to the tune of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah. Fiona Bruce crying whilst pictures of obese children struggling to press the keys on their iPhones to order more Domino's pizzas play behind her?
Maybe not, but my favourite quotes so far in this broadcast:
"Pull him off 10 minutes into the game" (Need I point out any innuendo here?)
"The only thing he was missing was a red nose"
"I think it's going to be very tight" (More innuendo)
"Running for ball" (This one could also be sexual)
"It will be sticky for the first few minutes" (It's getting far too easy)
Over and out.
Tuesday, 30 December 2008
Variety is the Spice of Life
As another bunch of celebrities prepare to enter the Big Brother house, I'm sure everyone is gripped with anticipation, shivering with anxiety and foaming at the mouth with intent (either that or you've forgotten your insulin injection).
Last year proved quite a milestone in television, showing that it was OK to call Indian people "Poppadom" and tell them to go home, especially if they were indeed from India. What then followed was an horrific victimisation of a talented, intelligent, and, in many ways, prominent thinker of our times; Jade Goody.
Jade Goody, television star, novelist, fitness guru (she's appeared in 5 fitness DVDs), and all round role model for children and adults everywhere is a great example of "Do what you can with what you've got" - and she's done incredibly well off it. Except for cancer.
Now that we are being forced by the state to accept all these racial types, and not hurl racial slurs at them (political correctness gone mad it is) I'm wondering where this will lead us. A multi-ethnic and multi-cultural society? Not on my watch.
And if variety is the spice of life, do we still need Cloves? Or are Schwartz going to struggle in the current political climate, forced out by an accepting, tolerant and welcoming environment, embracing variety?
And so to a rare hypothesis; Political Correctness will render Herbs and Spices (and the industry thereof) irrelevant and unnecessary. You heard it here first.
Last year proved quite a milestone in television, showing that it was OK to call Indian people "Poppadom" and tell them to go home, especially if they were indeed from India. What then followed was an horrific victimisation of a talented, intelligent, and, in many ways, prominent thinker of our times; Jade Goody.
Jade Goody, television star, novelist, fitness guru (she's appeared in 5 fitness DVDs), and all round role model for children and adults everywhere is a great example of "Do what you can with what you've got" - and she's done incredibly well off it. Except for cancer.
Now that we are being forced by the state to accept all these racial types, and not hurl racial slurs at them (political correctness gone mad it is) I'm wondering where this will lead us. A multi-ethnic and multi-cultural society? Not on my watch.
And if variety is the spice of life, do we still need Cloves? Or are Schwartz going to struggle in the current political climate, forced out by an accepting, tolerant and welcoming environment, embracing variety?
And so to a rare hypothesis; Political Correctness will render Herbs and Spices (and the industry thereof) irrelevant and unnecessary. You heard it here first.
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